Rant Part I

I haven't posted a blog in a while - not that anybody even reads my blogs - but I decided that since I can't sleep. Might as well. Right imaginary reader? Thoughts so. Anyway, I have had a few things on my mind as of late so I'll probably talk about each of them individually (ie: seperate blogs). Starting with Douche Knuckles... also known as Dick Lick, Cock Jockey, Ass hat and any number of things... there is a point in time, in every body's life, where they are going to encounter once such person. It is unavoidable. Recently, I encountered one such person. Thankfully, this encounter happened over the Internet and I never saw the ass hat in person. But it is still something that has been bugging me.

Why? That's probably what you're asking right now. Why do you care what some cock jockey thinks? The answer is simple: I don't. I know that goes against the fact that it's been on my mind since the encounter happened but I honestly don't care what they think -- well, I mostly don't care what they think. Something they said, not to me directly, has been bugging me. It has been eating away at me. Why? Because what they said could actually be true. They could have hit the nail on the head and it bugs me. It also bugs me that in every encounter since said Douche Knuckle, who will from hence forth be known as Dino Douche, has treated me with silence. He doesn't even have the backbone to tell me to fuck off... he just sits there in his little shroud of silence.

Anyway on to the point... in encounter one, as it will be known from today onward, there were things that were said. Jokes that were made. All in good fun... stuff making light of serious topics but still, all in good fun. Thinking that everybody in the chat had a sense of humor I didn't censor myself saying "Will somebody get offended?" and honestly, I don't care if people are offended by me. It just shows they take everything too seriously. Now, as the chat continued on and on my friend - the connection between Dino Douche and myself - requests that I be as weird as I can. Just talk about whatever, no matter how weird. So, being the friend that I am... I do it. More jokes are made, and then my calling card of sorts... Jew jokes. Well, it really only took one Jew joke... (One Jew Joke to Rule Them All, if you will) and the guy went running. Complaining about myself and one other person to 'The Connection'.

'The Connection' relayed the complaints to me and we all laughed but slowly, one comment made its way into my brain where it has been festering for the last couple of days. I tried to play it off like it was nothing in a following encounter but to be honest. It bugs me... it bugs me almost as much as the silence from the guy does. He said that I have no respect for other people and that I just say whatever I want to try and get a cheap laugh, so it may not have been in those words exactly but I'm not retarded... despite some questioning from a few people. I know what he was getting at and it didn't work, he didn't get a light shined on him that made him look better. If anything, 'The Connection' dislikes him even more now... but I digress. Those words about me have been eating away at me and have actually affected how I see myself... I've felt as though I have been subconsciously censoring myself.

Whether this is actually what is happening or not, I cannot say for sure but that's the way I see it. Of course, those around me have a clearer picture as they're not as bugged as the words of the fuckbucket as I am. Not sure why it's hitting me this hard... like a bunch to the gut, or an elbow to the groin...

To Be Continued in Rant Part II